Alcoholism Treatment without Abstinence: Is Moderation a Viable Alternative?

Hi Rick,

I apologize for not responding sooner. I’ve read all the well-intentioned advice people have given you. Many say they were or are in recovery, and the answer to your question is a resounding NO. I know this from my 27 years of sobriety, starting on October 28, 1991. Initially, I didn’t believe I was an alcoholic, nor did my husband. It took nearly a year to find and stay sober. If there are other programs out there, I’m not aware of them, and I don't want to find out. Often, what sounds too good to be true usually is.

The key to sobriety is total abstinence. This means no alcohol and no drugs. The popular misconception is that alcohol isn’t a drug because it’s legal and society doesn’t frown upon it. The truth is, alcohol is a drug. My brother-in-law, a drug addict, assumed he could drink because he didn’t have an alcohol problem. Unfortunately, he needed to be clean and sober from both drugs and alcohol to be considered truly clean and sober. This is the definition of total abstinence.

I want to clarify that I am not endorsing Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). However, I started my recovery in New York where they are strict. It’s either ALL or NOTHING – no in-between. I tried all the approaches, including Alcoholics Anonymous, but nothing worked. Through experience, I learned the critical distinction between how much one drinks and what that drinking does to you. People who could "drink me under the table" weren’t alcoholics; they were heavy drinkers. When I drank, I couldn't stop. This defined my condition as an episodic binge drinker.

The issues I faced only subsided under 90 days of sobriety. It was far easier for me to stay sober than to get sober. As long as I didn’t pick up a drink, I didn’t have the obsession or compulsion. I was fortunate because once the obsession and compulsion lifted, it never returned. I had to call the AA hotline after having my first drink in the afternoon. I was terrified and cried hysterically, but they gave me the name of a meeting that night.

Reports in the medical community refer to alcoholism as a three-fold disease: physical, emotional, and spiritual. There are debates about whether it’s harder to become sober or to stay sober. However, my experience led me to believe that staying sober is easier, as long as you don’t pick up a drink.

Alcohol is cunning, baffling, and powerful. I added insidious to that. Most people, including alcoholics, are under the false impression that if they stop drinking, the disease goes into remission. It doesn’t. Instead, it grows alongside your sobriety. If someone picked up a drink after 30 days of sobriety, they might not have much to lose. However, after 30 years of sobriety, a single drink could be fatal. I’ve seen this play out, and thankfully, those individuals didn’t die.

Tackling your question directly, I don’t know of any programs that don’t ask for anything in return. All groups are based on the principles of AA, such as Narcotics Anonymous (NA), Overeaters Anonymous (OA), and others. These programs are free, and the choice to participate or not is yours. Good luck.

- [Your Name]