The Art of Setting New Privates Up for a Fall in Military Boot Camp
Once upon a time, I served as an aviation mechanic in the Marine Corps. During my tenure, we, the older, more experienced Marines, played a variety of harmless but endearing tricks on brand new privates. These pranks served not only as a way to break the ice and ease the transition from recruit to Marine but also to prepare them for the challenges that lay ahead. Join me as I recount some of the classic pranks we used to play, the memorable characters involved, and the hilariously inevitable results.
Common Pranks in Marine Corps Culture
Running Errands with Unattainable Tasks
One of our favorite pranks involved sending a new Marine on an impossible task. For instance, we would direct them to walk 100 yards to the parachute riggers, or to locate a specific hazmat locker with a terribly obscure and dangerous fluid. These tasks were not just difficult but often led to cascading misadventures and humorous mishaps.
Playing With Words and Rank
A particularly memorable prank involved the nickname 'Rowie'. Rowie was our buddy, a deceased roast chicken who looked like a Hollywood special forces alumnus. When a new recruit (jube) joined our platoon, Rowie would strut into the room clad in a ceremonial uniform with SAS shoulder flashes and captain’s pips, while one of us would yell 'stand fast.' Rowie would then introduce himself as Captain Rowie from the SAS, making a grand entrance that often left the new recruit awestruck.
The SAS Recruiter Myth
According to Rowie, he was scouring the battalion for potential SAS recruits. He would often tell these young Marines that they looked like the sort of individuals who would excel in special forces missions. Under the pressure of Rowie's charismatic demeanor and the blinding urgency of his mission, several eager new privates would agree to sign paperwork, only to report to the Company Sergeant Major (CSM) with a shock of reality. The CSM, clearly irritated, would bellow inaudibly, prompting the young Marine's return, disgraced and humiliated by his own naivety.
British Army Pranks: Tales of Mechanized Innocence
My brother's friend was about to embark on an armored vehicle driving course in the British Army. The instruction regarding push-button starts was clear: do not press the ejector seat button. Our friend took this advice to heart, adamantly refusing to start the vehicle without first ensuring the ejector seat button was safe. Predictably, this adherence to instructions pushed him into a precarious situation, with authorities almost charging him with a crime he actually believed he was committing: not pressing the ejector seat button.
More Military Humor
These pranks, we would enjoy from the safety of our balcony as the new recruit frantically attempted to explain himself to higher-ups. Back in the platoon, the humiliation was palpable as fellow Marines roared with laughter at the sight of their comrade's predicament. Nicknames were aplenty, with some inventive comrades dubbing him 'Rambo' or 'Matrix', depending on how they altered the situation.
The Impact of Playful Pranks
While these pranks might seem juvenile and unheavenly to the minds of non-military personnel, they served a crucial role in shaping the culture and camaraderie within a platoon. These moments of shared laughter and collective effort helped new privates to feel a part of the larger military community and to understand the inherent sense of humor that permeates military life. Through these jokes and pranks, we built a cohesive unit, ready to face the endless suck with a bit less fear.
Are you a veteran who has experienced similar pranks in your service? Share your story below and let's create a compelling gallery of military pranks and the memorable moments they bring.